Maintain At Traction. Someone has to start doing it, and I hope to help us all do it. What exactly does this mean? If you don't know, I don't know if I can help you, really. Some basic knowledge is required. It's like bringing a horse to the water, only to realize that the horse can only drink caffeinated soda! Does this make sense? Well, I agree, it doesn't make any sense, but the point is there... I think..

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Location: Utah, United States

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Attraction Tips 1

  • From Zan (Interviewed by Lance Mason):
    • To develop extreme connection, within 90 minutes of a conversation on a date, do the following (Based off of Study done by Dr. Arthur Aaron, from USC(?), in 1991):
      1. Talk about a time in life when you were very embarrassed; date must reciprocate this.
      2. Talk about a time in life when you were really scared; date must reciprocate this.
      3. Talk about something about your parents, or how you would feel if you lost a parent.
      4. Interject to tell date, "Sorry to interject, but I had to tell you this. This is what I like about you so far..."
    • Keys to have a good relationship with women, even after a breakup.
      1. When they feel cheated, disrespected, or that you were dishonest.
      2. Example: "I don't know where this is going, but I ADORE you."
  • From Brent (Interviewed by Lance Mason):
    • In a social situation, gather information from women, move on to other groups, and then start connecting the groups together- become the social host.
    • If a woman asks a question, you can banter and not give a straight answer for couple times. However, when she keeps asking, give a straight answer, but then say, "but the other answers were more fun, weren't they?" Then you get permission to go back to being fun, while the woman knows you are real at the same time.
    • Brent started "Scripted Dates."

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Maintain Attraction - Story from Grant Adams

Grant Adams, though I don't agree with everything he promotes, is one who emphasizes using words and a genuine caring heart for women, when it comes to maintaining attraction. Here is a copy of one of his recent experiences that I really love. Pay attention to his amazing choice of words in describing his circumstances and environment, the bantering he used with the dancer to start a conversation, and most of all the warmth we should have for ALL women that he emphasizes in the end!


Her breasts burgeoned like two almond dunes from under white silk. Her thighs? Twin soft honey tubes flowing from under her tight,
high skirt. She couldn't have been more than 22, and, even though it was 6:30 in the morning, every man's attention followed her
across the airline terminal as if she were perfume in motion.

I brought my attention back to the ticket kiosk. I'd been dealt a middle seat so was requesting a seat change. The machine offered
me whole empty rows or an aisle seat next to two filled seats. This is where it gets interesting...

The night before I'd conducted an interview with Doc, who appeared in the book, The Game. He said his secret to knowing hundreds of
women was to always say "yes" to opportunity. "I am a yes man," he explained, "if someone invites me anywhere, I say yes. You never
know who you will meet, or to whom that person will introduce you."

So even though I wanted to sleep, I said "yes" to the aisle seat next to the two filled seats, rather than stretching out alone.

As providence would have it, Almond-Breasts was already curling up in the middle seat there with her equally slinky friend cuddling
into her shoulder by the window.

Women who look like these two (and dress like these two) are hit on ALL THE TIME -- as anyone who's been in my program knows. And they find it annoying.

So I nodded a simple hello, and joked with the guy behind me that she looked like a terrorist - something about her suspicious heels
"because no regular person would wear heels like that." She laughed. But I only gave her a brief glance.

We all slept and later in the flight, I brought her a blanket when I went to get water, commenting that I noticed she was pulling her
little white skirt down over her thighs every few minutes. Yes, I'd been watching.

She was grateful.

I said, "I'm a good daddy," meaning that it's natural for me to take care of people from being a father - but she smiled back as if
I meant it sexy. (By the way, there's a gift line for all you single dads out there.)

We started talking and when she peeled off her little sweater, I saw the tattoos. She told me she was only in Vancouver for a night
and I knew instantly she was an erotic dancer.

Naturally, I quite seriously asked if the two of them were accountants doing a one-night audit or lawyers doing some
depositions on a Saturday night. They looked at each other like I was nuts. Since they didn't get that I was playing with them, I
told them I knew they were dancers.

While her friend dozed, I told Almond Dunes about our project and did a full half hour interview about what guys do right and wrong
with her. You will read all the details in the handbooks I am writing based on my very, very difficult research. But for now,
know that she said the word for how men approach her is... annoying. The key she offered: be interested in her, casually at
first, like a friend, then more deeply if she responds.

After a half hour, she commented how great it felt to talk to me and invited me to join her at the neighborhood bar where she likes
to hang out. A few minutes later, she followed me through the gates at customs and giggled, "I'm stalking you."

Listen to women. Ask them real questions. They LONG to tell the truth to men, and it warms them to you.

Flash forward to my flight back to the States...

I had just completed a workshop that filled me with a bodily knowledge of just how precious every woman feels inside, no matter
how she looks. And also, of all the pain and hurt and contraction that women carry in their bodies from childhood, from adolescence,
from womanhood (more on that as we go along).

I sat, turned to the woman next to me, our eyes locked, and I said, because I meant it, "You are the most beautiful woman in the

She smiled and then repeated what I said to HER girlfriend in the window seat. That woman nodded in agreement. Her girlfriend
hadn't heard me because she was about 80 years old.

And the woman next to me - also about 80. Her eyes were two smiles, her skin as delicate and smooth as paper. She possessed a
deep, deep beauty. And when I confessed my admiration for her beauty, she lit up like a 13 year old girl.

When I deplaned and found myself in the arms of a far younger beautiful lady, and told her this story, she melted. And for one

To be able to see into the beauty of any woman is to acknowledge the beauty of all women.

When you see into the beauty of the plain, the old, the too-young, the sullen, the damaged - you honor the deep beauty of the feminine.

When you deeply feel into any woman, you will love her like a lost daughter/sister.

And listen well: if you cultivate this ability, any woman who is worth knowing will find herself deeply allured to you for your expansive, peaceful, protective, grown-up, masculine heart.

Love into women's beauty.

And women's beauty will love into you.

To your success,



For more information on Grant, see one of my first blog entries.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Maintain At Traction - Jazz Music in Utah

I've started to listen to Jazz music and have begun to love it, since about several years ago. It's so soothing, quiet, really enhances any romantic atmosphere, or simply relaxes me in a feel-good mood. To maintain traction in life, we all need the time to relax and just chill, soak in life, and vent out the frustrations. Jazz really has that capability to help us do this.. I think I'm just getting older maybe.. ;)

My roommate, Jonathan De Guzman, bought Michael Buble's CD for his sweet wife, Jasmin, during his last year at Cornell when she was going to dental school in Pittsburgh. My favorite song was "Home" . I still love that song. This was my first introduction to Jazz music that I actually enjoyed... a lot!!

Today, I was browsing the internet and found out about Shaun Barrowes, a local Jazz musician from Spanish Fork, Utah. He has an amazing voice, and I love his music!!! He's got a concert going on this weekend, and I hope to attend and check him out live. What's really cool, is that I sent a brief email on Shaun Barrowes' My Space account (He's officially a friend of Joe's My Space Account) and he actually responded with a personal email!!! It's so nice to have that personal correspondence from musicians, which either says he's still local and small, or simply a down-to-earth and nice guy. I believe it's more of the latter, maybe because Jazz has soothed his soul enough to be free of all the hustle and bustle of life...

Listen and Love Life!

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Maintain Attraction - Comments on some PUA's

PUA's, or Pick-Up Artists... They believe that building attraction can be taught and learned. They've mastered or have excelled at that "Art."

I'm going to make some comments on some PUA's blogs, and I'll do this from time to time.

Here's the first guy, Walter's "Field Report". What I like about Walter's approach was that he made a funny face, in the middle of traffic! What it did, is that it immediately tore down the psychological wall that the girl had, and got her to laugh. It's critical, I believe in any situation in life, to just relax and have fun with life. You allow yourself and others to be cool, comfortable, and enjoy the time together, be it with friends, your dates, family, or anyone. So guys, KEEP IT FUN IN LIFE! :)

The next guy is Niels. You can check our Niels' "Field Report", too. What I'd like to emphasize here is that he pulled off two important aspects really well:
1. Bantering
2. Building Rapport

Bantering is essentially where guys or girls will tease or joke around with each other playfully. The key is to be playful. When you get serious, and sarcastic, then the fun is gone, and you better watch out because you're building up animosity, rather than attraction. Bantering allows a guy to set himself apart, but also show that he can be a fun person to be with.

Rapport can be built by connecting with the other person on a deep emotional level. You find out about who the other person really is, not what her job is, what radio station she listens to, what kind of food she likes, etc. All these are fine, but you need to go deeper into what she really likes and why, discover what makes her special, etc. This is where you build a relationship that she will cherish and that you will find meaning. Rapport is what Lance Mason and the Pickup101 community are experts at, and what they emphasize a lot.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Restaurant Review in Orem Utah - "Date" at PF Chang's

October 3rd, 2006, I went out on a "date." Yes, I go on dates, even on a weekday (Tuesday to be exact), and I don't like to think of it as a date sometimes. Not because of my date, (who by the way is a really cool girl; yes, I'm hetero) but just because I like to have a chill, relaxed atmosphere and mind when it comes to women and friends. As many of you might know, this state of mind is a good basis to have when meeting guys and girls, and is something that most women prefer guys to have, especially initially. Basically, "Keep it Cool" is a great advice for those who'd like to Maintain Attraction.

Ok, on to the "date." We went to P.F. Chang's in the University Mall in Orem, Utah. My Korean friend asked about a curry dish, and our waiter gave some detailed answer, which I don't remember. Of course, I ordered my favorite dish at P.F. Chang's, their lettuce wrap appetizer. That stuff is so good. It reminds me of the Korean "ssam"; the lettuce makes it have a fresh taste and when eaten, it splashes fat water inside the mouth.

Our main dishes finally arrived, but the waiter brought three dishes, one for me and two for my friend. Apparently there was a miscommunication and my friend had asked whether the Coconut-curry came with noodles, or something to that extent, and in the process, ordered two dishes. So we had the coconut curry, and the street noodles, and my Sriracha Shrimp Salad. I loved my salad, though I was a little upset that the waiter brought out the other two. It was mostly because somehow it seemed the waiter was careless or lacked common sense.

So, to the conclusion of this long review. We were about to leave and asked for the check. The waiter ( I think his name was Kamdon) gave us the check and told us that he had told the manager about our situation, and that the manager agreed to write off the coconut curry!!! Wow, that was very nice of them, and now they have made me happy.

From my small experience in helping with my brother's business, BoomYEAH, I have come to realize that customer satisfaction is tremendously important. This is one aspect of Corporate America that Americans should be proud to have! Honestly, from my experiences in Asia and Europe (where even exchanges are difficult to get), though limited they may be, I have not come across a business culture that is so open to satisfying customers as in America. Here is the long-term benefit of this philosophy: It pays to make your customers happy, even if you lose money in the short-term, because a happy customer will do your marketing for you, and will bring additional customers to you. Look at me! I wouldn't have written this review and be so willing to praise (?) P.F. Chang's if I had not been given the courtesy they gave me!

(For more restaurants check out BoomYEAH Yellow Page for Asian Restaurants in Provo and Orem Utah, or check out my own homepage for all of my reviews and recommendations.)

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

"All Marketers are Liars" - Seth Godin speaks at Google

Pretty good video on marketing. This is some of what I highlighted:

- Create a STORY for your customers
- Don, currently Chairman of the Board, had a brilliant marketing plan for Hallmark's slow season of July. He decided to market collectible Christmas ornaments and using the "permission" capital from customers, Hallmark collected emails for those who wanted to be posted on the following year's collectibles. Come around next year in July, Don sent out emails, and in one 24 hour period made $92 million profit from selling collectible Christmas ornaments!
- "The real growth is going to come from things that work better when my friends get them too and I will selfishly tell my friends to go do it."
-"The best kind of idea viruses - the ones where we just need a tiny group of people, who are alread interested, you don't have to twist their arms."

Seth Godin is the author of six bestsellers, including Permission Marketing and "All Marketers are Liars." Seth was founder and CEO of Yoyodyne, an interactive direct marketing company, which Yahoo! acquired in late 1998. He holds an MBA from Stanford, is a contributing editor to Fast Company magazine, and was called "the Ultimate Entrepreneur for the Information Age" by Business Week.

This video is part of the Authors@Google series.

Friday, September 15, 2006

Maintain Attraction

Here's the first element of Maintain-At-Traction- maintaining attraction.
Let me first place a disclaimer that I do not claim to be an expert on this subject and that I am a man (hence I make many mistakes), so please take whatever I say with many grains of salt. A lot of times, I will be simply stating my opinions, which comes from limited experiences, naturally.

I believe the best way to maintain anything is to keep creating whatever it is that you want to maintain. Attraction can be created and hence can be maintained. For today, let me just go ahead and list some links to professionals, people who actually make money teaching this stuff. I don't agree with everything they say, especially when what they teach and live does not fit my Moral Standards. However, I do believe they teach a lot of truth, and I hope to be a channel to bring their advice all together in one spot.

As of now, let me suggest some links that you can check out for building attraction:
1. David De Angelo's "Double Your Dating"- This guy's specialty is "Cocky and Funny" approaches.
David De Angelo
2. Lance Mason and his PickUp 101 team - These guys actually have training weekends where guys can pay thousands to do role plays from experts and then hit the streets of SF to practice live. I think their specialty lies in not just bantering, but especially in building rapport.
Lance Mason
3. Grant Adams - His specialty is in online dating and written communication.
Grant Adams
4. Neil Strauss: This guy's book "The Game" has become a classic in the "pickup artist" community.

As I am male, the guys that I suggest for now are those who focus on helping men build their "game" for women. Let me just tell you that they are not some random "dating gurus" that I found, but rather they are people whose teachings (can't think of a better word than this) I have read and applied personally. So that must make me a chick magnet by now, huh? Obviously I have always been one since my preschool days, but as any man in the world, I can always improve on my game.

Here's my first contribution to the society of men for women. Peace!